Yuh Liming in Trinidad and Tobago

Oh hey everyone. Remember me? Your state of the art food critic? Yuh know, I've just been busy exploring the world (one country) and eating a lot.

Mostly when drunk. And that woman is my idol

Ahhh Trinidad and Tobago, I'm back and it's all been worthhh it. Worth it because now I can share with you all, my loyal minions, one of the most amazing experiences I ever had. With some of the best foods that I never knew existed, mostly because I only truly discovered this side of my heritage this year. And I am GRATEFUL for it, but mostly for the continuous intense gluttony it brings me. Adding another slew of foods to my repertoire!? Foodie Falz LIVIN THE DREAM.

Maracas Beach-Non-food pic for jealousy purposes

For starters, Trinidad and Tobago had foods that were unlike most that I eat on a regular basis. Mostly because they largely consist of various types of curries, from the strong Indian cuisine influence, and I have never been one to enjoy curry. So, one would assume I would've hated everything I ate, but that was definitely not the case. Considering that I mostly consumed street foods off random carts and small shops by locals throughout my trip, (ya know, like NYC food trucks, but probably without FDA regulations), I will begin with the most popular and must try item: Bake and shark. Shark and bake. Whatever the kids are calling it these days. Consumed at the ever popular and gorgeous beach above, Maracas. Makes me want chant ay ay ayy.

Andrew Zimmerman has eaten here. So I was basically close to fame.

Bake and shark was so good, I had it twice in one day. The bake is fried dough, which is really what every good food consists of: fry or diee. Except excessive fried foods can really do the latter, so forget I said that. The shark is exactly what you would think: those scary critters under the ocean with the sharp teeth that haunt your dreams. From "Jaws" specifically. Except they fry them, so they're just swimming in your stomach in a peaceful manner.

See? Peace. On a bake.

When eating a Bake and Shark, there are a slew of toppings one can put on. Pretty sure mine had tomato, lettuce, cucumber, garlic sauce, some type of thousand island, mustard, ketchup, coleslaw, and not pepper sauce. Because no, I still cannot handle the heat even after discovering my roots. Shame on my face. And after taking a couple bites, and savoring every morsel, I added in the very popular, mango. Because in Trinidad, everything is better with a mango. Curried, chutney, plain from the mango tree, everything is better with it. And I tried every version and every form. And literally miss it every day.

Just being a regular island girl, picking dem mangoes

To continue on my Trini street food binge, I also loved the famous fried (sensing a theme here?) deliciousness of both pholourie and doubles. My first taste of pholourie was acquired when my feisty aunt decided to take the last of the street vendors doughnut hole sized fried split pea dough balls, literally bottom of the barrel ones left. They were about to throw them away, which would've been a crime, and Trini's always speak their mind. Also given to us, because my aunt gracefully asked, was a mango chutney sauce (how I miss thee mangoes) that I can still taste as I think about it. Le sighhh.

Clearly not my photo, but just wait for the appetizing double.

Doubles were not nearly as sweet, but still fried. So that basically means I loved this as well. Made with two bara breads, which is flat fried bread, filled with curried chick peas, and tamarind/mango chutney, yet again with no spicy kick because I continue to be a basic white chick, I devoured these and took this horrifyingly unappetizing picture.

You know you want it

This is making me hungry and I am now legitimately scouring the internet for places where I can get doubles and pholourie in NYC. Please help me in my quest. But I digress. Although those were the top foods, I was also able to try Roti, Oxtail, Pelau, macaroni pie, calla-loo, sweetbread, and the famous Trini breakfast of Bake and Saltfish. Confusing? No idea what any of that means? Let me break it down for yuh.

Surprisingly, I liked the warp roti a lot, which I literally compared to a Mexican burrito, but in Indian esque form. Mine had chicken, curried mango, potato, pumpkin.....I literally cannot remember the rest. It was messy, but it was fantastic. I definitely also ate another type of roti by just dipping the bread, but my brain is fried. From all the fried food I consumed. Yes, I'm aware I'm so incredibly lame sometimes.

Need this in NY. Stat.

Although I won't go into depth about oxtail, because I feel like it's self explanatory/I'm lazy, it had amazing flavors that were easy to eat off the bone. Although let me just say, I only ate it because the place was out of the beloved corn soup, and I wasn't about to delve into cow heel soup. Which probably doesn't make me a true Trini. With the oxtail, I had my last bit of pelau, which was probably my favorite dish of the trip, most likely because it closely resembles my favorite Puerto Rican dish of Rice and Gondules. Made with pigeon peas as well, this dish basically only differs because of the various meats that can be used, (mine had chicken) the addition of mango (duh), and coconut milk. Pair this one with the oxtail instead of pernil, and I'm in heaven.

heart eyes emoji.

Macaroni pie was basically mac and cheese in a pie form. But homemade mac and cheese, not that crappy Kraft stuff. (I cannot make fun of Velveeta.) With an additional kick of Trini style that cannot be replicated. This was served alongside calla-loo, which derives from Africa and is basically made from a leafy vegetable called dasheen, much like okra or collard greens, made with coconut milk, pumpkin, and a slew of spices, and is very soupy in texture. Mix this all together with some stewed chicken, and I had a couple of home-cooked meals.

Homemade sweetbread was something that I was actually able to take home with me, since it was made so often and seemed to be in abundance by my granny. Sweet as the name says, it was made basically from coconut and raisins. This was my go-to food when I was awaiting other meals, which seemed to be more often than not. Gotta love the relaxed island attitude. :)

Last but certainly not least, my aunt made the traditional breakfast of Bake and Saltfish, the bake being the same exact breading we ate with the bake and shark, while the saltfish consisted of tomatoes, onions, flaked saltfish, which is similar to codfish, and various other spices. Paired together with the bake, I think I might've eaten three. Because even in a foreign land, I'm a glutton.

There you have it. Trinidad and Tobago. Lime and grub. Drinking a Carib. Grinding to soca. Starving for some Trini food. I hope I sufficiently made everyone jealous, mostly of the Caribbean if the food ain't your thang. Because is that not the point of the internet nowadays? CORN SOUP foeva. True Trini style.

"The Best of Astoria"= Unbuttoned Pants Glory

I never miss an all-you-can-eat event. Except buffets.

This past Thursday, I went to an eating spectacle in the foodie capital of the world-Astoria, Queens at BBQ mecca The Strand. Ok ok, I wish it was the foodie capital, and a BBQ mecca from Texas, but it does have an enormous amount of food options for a small section in the larger NYC metropolis, and it's great because you can literally find any and every type of cuisine. Variety at its finest. Hosted by a fellow blog site We Heart Astoria, this event brought out the best that Astoria has to offer, from the drag queens to the BBQ, which obviously go hand in hand.

Get it gurls (boyz)

Since I've actually been to a couple of the Best of Astoria winning restaurants, I'm going to include those in here, as well as what I gleefully consumed from The Strand, which may or may not have been a winner....(This is really just my way of adding suspense to keep you here).

To get right down to it, the winner for favorite restaurant in Astoria wasssss (hint: it's not Greek, a hookah lounge, or a beer garden; Astoria surprisingly has other things) Il Bambino! A panini joint. Small plates. Really a rendition of all the new hipster places popping up, but I won't hate, since I've been and really enjoyed it. But me enjoying it doesn't say much, since I enjoy most food all day err day. The give you a jist of what this place caters to, common ingredients include prosciutto, goat cheese, truffle oil, and various other ingredients of high, gourmet quality.

Quality Queens

In a completely contradictory way, the winner for the favorite burger joint AND the favorite vegan/vegetarian friendly restaurant was the same place: BareBurger. Interesting, since BareBurger has more meat options,  than any other venue I've personally been to besides a BBQ place, but I guess these veggie Astoria folk enjoy being surrounded by Ostrich, Lamb, and Bison burgers. All wonderful, unique options for the meat lover of course! Since the meat is organic and natural, I suppose that qualifies as veggie friendly...right. Quinoa burgers def do though, so maybe I should stop judging for once. Obviously, I've been here in regards to the hearty meats, but BareBurger is actually accessible in many parts of the city now besides Astoria, so although it originated here, and I love it greatly, you don't need to be in Astoria to have it. Personally, I think Petey's Burger should've won, (a strong contender, only in the LIC/Astoria area, and basically the best milkshake I've ever consumed) but I'm only speaking of the winners here and cannot digress. And I didn't even vote so my opinion means nothing. All I will say is try the applewood smoked thick cut bacon on whatever burger you wish, cuz OMGAH PARTY IN MY MOUTH. Try it too veggies, and pretend like it's tempeh.

Making myself hungry.

Moving along to breakfast options, even though I should've started with this, the winner for favorite bagel shop AND favorite coffee shop/cafe is: Brooklyn Bagel & Coffee Company. If you know me already, you know how many issues I'm already about to have. ASTORIA DON'T NEED YO BROOKLYN NAME BROOKLYN. Why no call it ASTORIA Bagel and Coffee?? Need the cool factor of hip, young, and trendy Brooklyn to get customers? I come to you regardless, because the REAL issue at hand are these double category winners existing due to the lack of competition. Astoria isn't really ripe with coffee options. Nor is it ripe with veggie options. I know I said it's a food mecca, but everything needs improvement, and this shop named after Brooklyn exemplifies it. Or maybe it just exemplifies that people are go to trendy places. But the bagels and cream cheese are good, just overpriced. Like Brooklyn itself. No surprise there.

This got nothing on the new Taco Bell breakfast menu

Naturally, after breakfast, people talk about street food vendors. I LOVE me some street food, and Astoria has some decent options. The winner, of course, was Wafels and Dinges, one of the original food trucks from Manhattan, which is NOT original to Astoria, but is pretty much the best dessert I've ever eaten. Nutella and speculoos (basically a more delicious form of cinnamon) ice cream and bananas? Obviously this would steal the hearts of locals.

Must-have.

Although Wafels and Dinges actually won, because trendy always wins, the runner-up is actually unique to Astoria and Astoria only. El Rey del Taco truck is a drunk Mexican food haven, which I know because I may or may not have unknowingly gotten extremely spicy food there once while drunk and burned my insides. But please, try it! I just can't handle the heat.

Perfectly safe, I assure you.

Last, but certainly not least, the winner for best BBQ joint (and another combo winner) favorite place to hear music is: The Strand Smokehouse, which is where this lovely event was held. This is where I unbuttoned my pants and almost vomited because you give me the key to unlimited grub and alcohol, and I go all the way to hell. Although I can't say if this BBQ was authentic, since I've never been to Texas or St. Louis or North Carolina (anyone want to sponsor me for trips?) I CAN say that in comparison to other BBQ joints I've tried in this area, I really, really liked this place. We were allowed two meats and two sides, so I chose brisket, chicken, mac and cheese, and cornbread. This was all while I was slopping down appetizers that were passed around, without napkins of course because I'm a ravenous animal. Unfortunately, I was too busy scarfing down the food to take legitimate pictures, but I do remember the appetizers consisting of a fried mac and cheese ball, crab cake, beef bouillon, and bacon wrapped mini hot dogs. I probably had around....7 of these before eating my actual meal. So....in essence...all I have to offer you is this:

I disgust myself, don't worry.

In non-typical Foodie Falz fashion, I couldn't finish it. That's how far I went guys. To the ends of my stomach and beyond. But I have no regrets. Maybe I should.....I HEART ASTORIA.

NYC Restaurant Week

AKA #NYCEatLikeAFatKidWeek

I know. I know. I'm late. With this entire blog and even restaurant week. I have a job people! I'm busy watching the Bachelor and thinking about my next meal.....while watching the Bachelor. No, that's not my job, but if it was I'd have time to keep up with this.

Anyways, back to business. This past week was my favorite time of year! An entire two weeks dedicated to the gluttonous offerings of NYC's food scene! Every year, NYC decides to open the doors of restaurants that you would probably never eat at otherwise (for the peasants that can't afford them) for two weeks in the Winter and Summer months. Three course offerings for a mere $25 lunch and $38 dinner! (used to be $35...crooks). I have celebrated this event in the past, but of course. Multiple times. But never with a food coma because the portions are so small (they get you there). So obviously, I celebrated. I rejoiced. I spent my entire paycheck on every single restaurant offered. I wish that were true, since I really only spent it on one. A lunch. Not even a dinner. But it was fancy and I'd never attend otherwise so that should matter....somewhat.

What is this fancy place of splendor you ask? Tom Colicchios Riverpark, located on the East River overlooking the wondrous Queens. Tom Colicchio is a big time chef, but really I went since it's close to work. And fancy, since I'm basically the peasant that falls for this. You know it's going to be a meal to remember when there's basically a butler service to take your coat and pull your chair out at the table. I've never even had a man do that for me! (Chivalry is dead? Not here). From the start, I knew this was worth my $25 bucks.

RiverPark offered their entire lunch menu for Restaurant Week, which most places rarely do. So props to them on that. Points deducted though for charging extra for certain dishes. If you offer it, keep it within what we are supposed to be spending. I don't want a supplemental fee! Then it basically shouldn't be on the menu. To start, I made a mess by eating this:

It's not jello. With green goo.

This, ladies and gents, is Duck Liver Pâté (I got those accents because I keep it classy...sometimes). Apparently, this is actually the cheapest form of liver, turned into meat paste, unlike foie gras (no accents). Meat paste....sounds appetizing right? I started out eating this with just my fork digging into the pâté ....not realizing the bread was there to put it on. Peasant. Apparently, this dish contained blood orange, pine nuts, and rosemary. I have no idea what the green goo was, but I didn't hate this. It was basically an expensive form of spam.....if you like things like that. But it was delicious and I was glad to try something new. Also, the salad was cute.

This just looks like a slew of pretty colors....but there's fish too.

For the main course, I tested my palate to some Merluza, because I love eating things I've legitimately never heard of before. If you have heard of it, you should take over my food blog. Apparently, with this fish, I was also eating a meyer lemon, fennel, Tokyo turnips, and bok choy. You would think this fish was from somewhere in Asia with the bok choy and turnips named after the capital of Japan, but no, it's basically the Spanish name for Cod. Ya know RiverPark, you could've just said that, rather than make it sound so fancy and high class. This was decent, but I probably should've gotten a leg of lamb, just so I could've said I ate the leg of a baby lamb.

Far too majestic to ingest

For the final course, which was obviously dessert, I had the apple tarte tatin, (couldn't just say an apple tart without that extra e) pictured terribly below:

Still not any form of jello

This consisted of pickled raisins, vanilla cream, walnuts, and apple fennel sorbet. Basically, this was a fancy apple pie. And we all know how much I love apple pie. Skip the apple fennel sorbet and give me some vanilla ice cream, or would that be too much like Applebees? Ok, I accept the sorbet. 

All in all, this entire meal was definitely worth it for a Restaurant Week lunch. I was highly impressed with the fact that although I forgot to put my napkin down on my lap and made it dirty with some duck liver, nobody kicked me out. They cleaned it up with a blade and gave me a new one, all while probably thinking I didn't belong there. Does it get better than that?