Time Out Magazine: Tacos, Tequila, and Grasshoppers? Oh My.

My friend sent me an article from The Village Voice yesterday that had a list of the 10 Worst People in NYC Restaurants. You know what Number 1 was? The Blogger. :Cue the sad, dramatic music.: Instead of fending off this title as the worst of the worst, quitting this blog, and pretending it all never happened, I went to another food event for Time Out Magazine called the NYC Taco Rally. In this lovely space in midtown, I took pictures of the food and asked a ridiculous amount of questions. I also knocked over an extreme amount of business cards because I’m a klutz. Wow, I really am the worst.

This event had it all: tacos with every type of meat and fish, margaritas, water, soda, weird spicy Mexican candy, nachos, and fried grasshoppers. WHAT!? EW. HOW COULD YOU!? I had no idea that I signed up for that, but I tried it anyways. For the sake of being the Number 1 worst person who eats in NYC, I ate fried grasshoppers and lived up to the title. I hate myself more than you do right now, I assure you.

 

In honor of this debacle, I will count down from my least to most favorite dish. Will the grasshopper taco win!? Is she that freaking insane? Read on to find out my little cherubs.

7. El Diablito Taqueria- The original local of this is in the East Village, but I don't think I'll be visiting. I'm going to be honest with y'all-this taco was so unmemorable in comparison to the others I really only know it was a corn tortilla. I don't know what the filling was, I think beef? My friend thought it was corned beef from a can and threw it out without finishing it, so. That's all there is to say about that. They did, however, have a lovely selection of Mexican candy, straight from the source. I had some corn lollipop that had a spicy red seasoning on it, and it wasn't tasty. The caramels were though, and my friend loved some mango lollipop she kept eating for the rest of the night. If all else fails with the tacos, give out interesting candy to keep the people coming. Kudos for that.

6. Toloache- The grasshopper has landed. I am not that insane because it is not even close to number one! I'm glad you all kept the faith. Or so I can only hope. So clearly this place is exquisitely Mexican in every way, because I have literally never heard of or been to a NY restaurant that served bugs. But I mean, I'd be crazier if I had. The owner is famous chef Julian Medina, who also owns Yerba Buena in the city, which I've been dying to try for a while now (but only during restaurant week). The taco itself had crab meat inside, onions, and I mean nothing else really matters since I decided to add on those optional grasshoppers as a topping. I'm not going to lie to you, I didn't hate it. The grasshoppers I mean. They added a crunchy, salty flair to the taco, and I would eat them again. WHO AM I?! Definitely not Andrew Zimmerman. Never say never.

They aren't alive, no worries.

5. Choza Taqueria- This gem of an establishment has two locations: one in the West Village, and another in the Flatiron District. The food is based upon the beachside food stands found in Northern Mexico, which I would know something about if I was more worldly and travelled there. This place had two options, and I got to try them both! Sometimes, I can be lucky. I chose for myself the vegetarian taco option, just because no other place had this and I wanted to experience it all JUST FOR YOU. Be proud of me, please. Because I obviously enjoy the meat options more. So the vegetarian option (on the right) had zucchini, squash, and mushrooms with an avocado salsa and some cheese. It was decent, but not something I would order again and again. Their signature was the carnitas taco, which had braised pork paired with a tomatillo salsa. I realized my deep love for all things pork recently, and I'm not sure whether I should be worried or happy that I can eat a pound of bacon and still want more. Regardless, this meat was divine and if I had solely based this off the carnitas, this place may be higher. But vegetables never win the race in my world.

This is the most appetizing picture I had? Yes.

4. The Bagel Store- I should probably go on some crazy rampage about how a BAGEL STORE is at a Taco Rally, since bagels and tacos are not the same food. Right? Or did someone change the matter of these two items to make them one unit? In regards to the bagel that I ate, I'm pretty sure this occurred. Located in Brooklyn (I promised myself I wouldn't mention the word "hipster" at all), this bagel store has been featured on the Food Network, which to me gives you the utmost credibility. They had 3 different bagels to choose from, including their famous bacon, egg, and cheddar cheese bagel (doesn't belong at a Taco Rally), the tex mex bagel that I consumed, and a Rainbow bagel that had margarita cream cheese. Om nom nommm, this really tasted like a taco in the form of a bagel. Job well done to them. I want to hate, but when something tastes so good, how can I resist!? Plus, I love all forms of cream cheese. Because it's a cheese, and I'm obsessed with cheeses. If that makes sense.


Taco flavored bagel with Mexicali cream cheese.

 3. Mercadito- Having a restaurant in many different locations can mean one of two things in my book: you are just that amazing that you can't possibly stick to one audience, orrr you are a chain and have semi-good to crappy food. Thankfully, Mercadito isn't of the latter. With two NY locations, one in Miami, and another in Chicago, this place is the crème de la crème of fish tacos. The Estilo Baja consisted of beer battered Mahi Mahi (I hope it's an IPA beer! Kidding...sort of), chipotle aioli, and Mexican-style coleslaw. Out of the two fishy tacos that I encountered, this one definitely passed with flying colors. I would definitely go back for more, perhaps in Miami?


Mahi Mahi-or Estilo Baja for the Espanola speakers

2. The Taco Shop-Sometimes, the addition of alcohol to anything brings up a rating. Sorry I'm not sorry. The Taco Shop was actually where I began my night, and I did not leave disappointed. They offered up two different tacos, one being Spicy Chorizo and the other being Chicken Tinga. I had the chorizo, because I'm partially Puerto Rican and love it to its core. The man of the hour was also dishing up some mini margaritas for us to try, with what was probably the cheapest brand of tequila anyone could ever purchase. But who's complaining? I ate the taco, drank my margarita, and sat in total and complete bliss. They are located in the West Village, I got their business card (without being a klutz), and I will most certainly make a triumphant return.

1. La Esquina-We've made it to number 1 without the grasshoppers!! Praisee. Since number 2 involved alcohol, number one is obviously the best because it involved alcohol AND amazing tacos. That combination is lethal. This place has two locations, one in Soho and another in Brooklyn. The taco was called the Carnitas made from pork shoulder, onions, cilantro, and salsa macha. Amazing pork wins my heart again of course. The drink was something made with cheap tequila that wasn't exactly a margarita but pretty much was. And the people working there were lovely. All around winners to me.

I feel bad that I was too busy enjoying these last two foods before thinking about photographing them. I am a failure as a blogger. But at least it maybe makes me less annoying? We'll go with that. Now I have this strong, sudden urge to go to Mexico....